H1-N1, How I Love Thee
Last Updated on Tuesday, 8 December 2009 09:00 Written by Scott Wegna Tuesday, 8 December 2009 09:00
Sorry there was no blog yesterday. I had one of those days where I have to actually act like an adult and be responsible for both myself and others. This happens quite a lot actually, but most of the time I’m not fasting while I do it. Started the day by taking my senile father-in-law to the lab for blood work. We showed up ten minutes before they opened and sat around for over an hour. Some stupid new policy where the lab is no longer first-come first-serve, but instead gives preferential treatment to the patients whose doctors actually work in that office. Dad sees a guy who specializes in cranky old people, so we get to wait until everyone has been seen, or someone fails to show up. It seems pretty stupid to me, since you know that Dad’s doctor pays more for the lab services than the in-house guys do.
For an hour the two of us sat there, neither one of us having eaten or had anything to drink yet that day. Every minute or so Dad would ask me what we were doing there, why they wouldn’t see him because we’d obviously been the first ones in the waiting room, and generally getting more agitated my the second because he didn’t really understand what was going on.
I was in a comma for most of this, because I was also having blood drawn (at a totally different and inconveniently located lab), so I hadn’t had breakfast yet or, more importantly, any coffee. At home we have a rule: no talking before coffee. This has saved Dorinda and I from many, many, stupid fights about nothing. I cannot function without a cup of joe. Several in fact Spread out across the day. I gave up smoking, I only drink socially, and I’ve replaced all the unhealthy snacks in my house with fruits and vegetables. But I will donkey-punch the first motherfucker who tries to stop me from drinking coffee by the bucket-full.
So anyway, they eventually see Dad. I happen to mention that I’m also fasting (and thus in a vegetative state) because I’m getting stabbed next. The lab person says, “well hey,we can do that! We’ll just have them fax your orders over to us.” Sweet, says I. That takes another small eternity to actually happen though. All the while Dad is getting more and more cranky. It’s been a while since I felt the urge to strike a senios citizen, but let me tell ya . . .
I’d left the house at 7:30 in the morning and it was almost 11am before I got home and made some coffee.
Then I hopped in the car and drove a billion miles to Nashua NH to see my own doctor for my physical. The only reason I don’t switch to a doctor in my own area is because I love Greg. Seeing him is almost fun. We joke around, we shoot the shit, I turn my head and cough -it’s actually a good time. Anyway, it turns out that I was way overdue for some shots. No problem. What? Four shots? eeeeh . . .oh-kay, I guess.
I get stabbed with a tetanus booster, flu shot, the H1-N1 shot, and for good measure, something to prevent me getting pneumonia. Just in case.
Today, guess what I have? The fucking flu. Well, not the flu, but flu-like symptoms as the shots do their work. As Greg put it, the stuff just sits in the muscle mass until your body absorbs it. This can hurt a lot sometimes. (It sure does!). It’s something akin to a fat lady squeezing into a size 6 dress. The muscles weren’t built to act as storage/distribution vessels.
And of course its the arm I work with that’s swollen and painful. So I’m sitting here, with the joint pain, fever, and hot/cold spells you get with the flu, but not actually feeling sick in the stomach. Scientifically its very neat. I just wish I didn’t have a Robo cover due today so I could lay on the couch and sleep it off.
Oh well.
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Oy! Sounds like Donkeypunching is off the menu today, my friend. I hope you feel better soon! Maybe if you just drank more coffee…..hmm…..
I got my flu + H1N1 (that I've heard pronounced “Hiney”) shots yesterday. No flu-like symptoms as of yet…but it's still early!
Rest if you can,
-Dave
Some “friendly” doctor…doesn't even have the common courtesy to stab you in the OTHER arm instead.
(Oh, and I'm still a big fan of Brian's idea of calling it “Hamthrax”)
haven't had a flu shot in over 10 years and I don't plan on it anytime soon either!!
yeah, man- flu shots are a scam. Infecting you with a virus to build an immunity to it is WHY these viruses are mutating more and more into these acronyms that are fun to splash across headlines.
I've never had a flu shot, I HAVE had the flu a few times in my life- but about 70% of the folks that I know who GET the shot get sick as dog…probably from the shot…or waiting in the office with all the sickies for 2 hours.
No disease incubators, or as they are more commonly called, kids, in the house, so I tend to skip the flu shot as well.
Feel better soon.
I also have not had a flu shot in about a decade. You just don't need 'em. They don't really help and I've also recently been reading that most flu shots that you receive use this preservative that has enough mercury in it to kill a baby, hence all the autism and other mental disorders springing up in young kids everywhere. The sad thing though is that our gov't has just had this policy of trying to wipe the flu out when it comes around because of the 1918 worldwide flu pandemic that killed over 6 million people in one winter; I watched a program on history that says that that one may have come from outer space, hence it was able to spread through the entire atmosphere in less than a month. That one, however, just like H1-N1 will eventually just mutate out of existence, its just how these things work, if not humans would not be here right now. Whats the shot to help prevent pneumonia? I've never even heard of that before.
The mercury = autism thing is way, way false. Long story short: there is mercury, but the type and amount are so absurdly minute that it's harmless. They've been using it since the '30s since it was believed to be safe type and dose, and they've done countless tests since just to be sure. There has never been credible evidence that it's caused any harm ever.
So…how much mercury is in Robo? Surely he's got a thermal switch or three that contain a little more than a trace amount.
Thank you Brian!!!
I know you guys in the states have a different vaccine than elsewhere (attenuated verus just proteins from the virus surface). And will not argue about wether one should get the flu vaccine or not, as this round does seem pretty tame. But I can't help wondering why people are generally feeling that vaccines are bad nowadays. It's a proven method to eliminate infections. The poliovirus has been eliminated from the Earth by a successful vaccination campaign (it was an attenuated virus). And now, because of the vaccine scares in UK, they're having more cases of measles, associated with child mortality because some children aren't getting vaccinated anymore.
As for the pandemic 1918 flu virus, phylogenetic analyses clearly show it has terrestrial origins.
I can't edit my text.
But it should have read : Smallpox has been eliminated from the Earth by a successful vaccination campaign (it was an attenuated virus) and Poliovirus has almost been eliminated.
Oh vaccines are totally the way to go. Only a complete idiot buys into that anti-vax garbage. Say what you want, for or against, about how we handle such things in the States or elsewhere in the world, but Science backs me up on this one.
I got shots in both arms. The nurse did one flu shot in each arm because they had an equal chance of having a painful after-effect. I just got lucky. =P
It turns out that actually getting sick from one of these shots is impossible. I just got lucky and got the flu or whatever. Joy!
Normally I don't bother with the flu shots at all. Even with the Widget I'm not a huge risk for getting sick. It was more a matter of, “Hey, since you came out here why not?” I was given the option of declining, but saw no reason not to do it.
Trimpnick -oh man the 1918 Spanish Flu epidemic! This will sound sick, but I LOVE that thing. Killed more Americans than WWI did. And it swept the globe right after the war, brought to the States most likely by the returning troops. Ironic tragedy -oof, really harsh stuff.
Oh vaccines are totally the way to go. Only a complete idiot buys into that anti-vax garbage. Say what you want, for or against, about how we handle such things in the States or elsewhere in the world, but Science backs me up on this one.
I got shots in both arms. The nurse did one flu shot in each arm because they had an equal chance of having a painful after-effect. I just got lucky. =P
It turns out that actually getting sick from one of these shots is impossible. I just got lucky and got the flu or whatever. Joy!
Normally I don't bother with the flu shots at all. Even with the Widget I'm not a huge risk for getting sick. It was more a matter of, “Hey, since you came out here why not?” I was given the option of declining, but saw no reason not to do it.
Trimpnick -oh man the 1918 Spanish Flu epidemic! This will sound sick, but I LOVE that thing. Killed more Americans than WWI did. And it swept the globe right after the war, brought to the States most likely by the returning troops. Ironic tragedy -oof, really harsh stuff.